Mediation is a voluntary process. Your mediator stays neutral throughout: they don't make decisions for you, but help you communicate, understand each other and find your own solutions. Although a mediator cannot grant your divorce, mediation can produce everything you need to avoid a contested court hearing about children or finances.
1. Your MIAM
Each of you meets the mediator separately for up to an hour. We explain how mediation works, listen to your situation and carry out a confidential safeguarding assessment. If mediation is suitable and you both want to go ahead, we book your first session. More about MIAMs.
2. Mediation sessions
In joint sessions, the mediator helps you both express your views, understand each other's priorities and identify where you agree and disagree. Sessions are 90 minutes by video.
- If being together is too difficult, shuttle mediation keeps you apart.
- If your children are 10 or over, child-inclusive mediation can give them a voice.
- For finances, you'll both share full financial information first.
3. Your agreement
The mediator helps you generate and test options, think through consequences and find creative ways to meet both your needs. When you reach agreement, we write it up:
- a parenting plan for child arrangements
- an Open Financial Statement and Memorandum of Understanding for finances
A solicitor can make a financial agreement legally binding through a consent order. Ark's fixed-fee legal package can take care of this, or you can use a solicitor of your choice.
4. Putting it into practice, and a six-month check-in
Agreements sometimes need fine-tuning once you live with them. Every Ark client is offered a free follow-up session six months after mediation to review how things are going and make adjustments.